Eliminating What is Holding You Back

On our journey to success there comes a point when we need to get rid of the unnecessary, which is usually what is stopping us from moving forward.

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There are so many things in our life that hold us back and don’t let us improve physically, mentally and spiritually.
And only by being aware of them, accepting them and letting go, can we free ourselves from the burden and unleash our hidden powers.

Sometimes these things are a big part of our daily life, it can be close people as well, or thoughts, objects and so on. We are often used to it so that means it will be hard to eliminate it once and for all. But this is the only way to make a big change and continue our growth on the path we’ve chosen.

The process

Β The first important thing is to identify what is holding us back.

It may be important to you, you may have grown up near it, you may love it and will most probably miss it, but that is the price you need to pay in order to achieve more, to keep moving forward and to get rid of past things.

So try to be as honest as you can and decide what it is that stops you from changing, what it is that has been keeping you in one place for years.

Then you will need to accept and realize the fact that these things aren’t good for you. This will help you learn to live without them faster.

And last but not least, simply let go. Leave them in the past, where they should be. This way there will be more happiness, peace and space in your present and less stress, worries and negativism.

What to eliminate

People

It sounds harsh to tell you to just eliminate people from your life and never see them again. But sometimes that’s what you need when you’re stuck.

We often don’t realize how someone around us, that we spend time with almost every day, has a bad influence on us.

So look around and examine the people in your life. Is there someone that is complaining about everything all the time? What about the negative people who are such pessimists that you lower your energy level and become a bit depressed the minute you meet them?
There are also the material ones, who probably only use you for their own benefits. And the people who only share their problems and never take the time to listen to yours. Not to forget the ones that have no goals, no desire to change, are full of bad traits and you’ve never actually learnt anything from them.

Such people are holding you back. They may be people you know from your childhood, colleagues, even roommates you have no other choice but to live with, a relative, a friend of a friend and so on. It can be anyone.

And it takes courage and determination to cut that person out of your life. Eliminating sounds very severe when it comes down to people. So you can just try to spend less time with them, not to take advice from them or let them ruin your mood.

I have such people in my life and have often met similar to the ones I described. My situation is rather difficult because my father is probably the most negative person I know.
And it took me a lot of effort to learn not to let his opinion, comments and actions affect mine. But it can happen if you give it time.

I also have a roommate who I find far from someone that can help me succeed. And I became quite good at ignoring. I know it sounds childish and not the best way possible, but that’s how I handled the situation.

Of course, every now and then I also communicate with people who are not the best example, and they are my friends. But I never let them affect me in any way. Instead, I concentrate on their good sides and benefit from that.

Stuff

Get rid of it!

I said that directly because I’m sure almost everyone lives in a place full of things he doesn’t use and need. So eliminate that and make free space in your life.

The more belongings you have, the more you need to take care of them, think about them, and handle unpredicted problems.

Be more of a minimalist and throw away, donate or give to acquaintances all the things you haven’t used lately or are saving for a rainy day.

Also, stop buying stuff you don’t need.

Food

I won’t tell you to stop eating. I will, however, tell you to throw away and never buy again one third of the things you eat.

The reasons about junk food are clear. It’s just junk. But we are also not meant to eat everything that contains sugar (and it’s much more that most people think), processed foods and grains.

The only food our body needs is fruits, veggies, eggs, nuts, some seeds, meat (I’m a vegetarian, but am just mentioning it). I will add fish and dairy products because I like them, although there are many bad opinions about them too.

It sounds ridiculous for most people to eat only that and I myself am still working on eliminating all of the others. It’s a slow process but totally worth it.

The thing is, variety in the food industry is a big lie. If you imagine all the food in your local supermarket at one place, what is actually okay for eating is a really small part of it. The rest is bad and absolutely unnecessary for our organism.

So I encourage you to start working on getting rid of these foods step by step.

Distractions

These are activities like watching TV, playing computer games, browsing the Internet for hours with no clear purpose, social medias, checking email every half an hour and so on.

I say ditch the TV, check your email once in the morning and once in the evening (except for those whose business depends on that, because I know many that do), delete most of your profiles in different social media platforms and keep one or two (I have more only because of my blog and use them rarely).

The problem with these distractions is that they sound so insignificant and minor compared to all the other things we do, but they really take a lot of time because we spend hours doing them without realizing.

They are one of the things holding you back. So be aware of that.

In your case, the activities may be of another kind. Everyone is different. These are just the most popular these days and the first that popped up in my mind.

Negative thinking

It’s such a bad habit.

Simply because you attract the things you think about the most, the things you worry about, imagine happening and fear.

The law of attraction works all the time and doesn’t make any difference between positive and negative things. It just gives you what you expect.

Many people are just used to expect the worst. They are negative all the time and full of doubts, fears and worries. That is why they have more and more of them.

And all this is so pointless. Nothing ever turns out to be that bad. And all the worries just ruin your present moment.

Negativism is definitely not something you can carry with you in your successful future. So get rid of it.

Instead, start thinking positively. Only this little change can help you achieve anything you want.

There are other things preventing you from moving forward. It’s your job to notice them and do something to eliminate them. Otherwise we can all stay in one place for the rest of our lives. It’s easy and comfortable. But nothing good will even happen there.

And outside, out of our comfort zone, is where the real magic happens.

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Lidiya K

Lidiya K

Author, blogger and podcaster in the fields of self-improvement and life hacking. Creator of Let's Reach Success.
Full-time freelance writer. Lifestyle designer.
Lidiya K

51 Comments

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    1. It’s good that you’ve realized it because now you’ll notice it each time it happens. Keep eliminating these stuff πŸ™‚
      Glad you enjoyed the post.

  1. Awesome post and makes so much common sense. I have already decided to limit the quality and quantity of television I watch. And today I deleted one of my social media accounts at least until I can set it up to benefit my blog. So I’m on my way πŸ˜‰ Thanks for sharing.

    LaTrice

  2. Thank you for your article. It is so difficult to avoid negativity from friends and family. I struggle to remain positive sometimes. It’s also difficult to remove some people from your life!

    1. I agree with you and understand you completely. But it’s important to just be mindful of all that. Once we notice it, we won’t let anyone affect us negatively.

    1. Thanks for reading it and commenting. I just checked yours out and found some very powerful thoughts in the lessons you summarized in the end. Thanks for sharing.

  3. Very well put Lidiya, fortunately I got rid of a lot of people years ago, I never saw any point having people in my life who were holding (or trying) to hold me back. Forward, I always hold, is the way to go with positiveness.

  4. This year I really want to get rid of some unnecessary material things I have hanging around. My goal is to give away more clothes and things, especially in my room. The more I give away, the more space I make for new things to come into my life. Thanks for the reminder πŸ™‚

    1. Many people have this problem. But you’ve got the solution so it’s up to you now. Good luck. I’m sure there won’t be only free space in your home, but also mental benefits. It’s just relieving.

  5. Lidiya… Great read! Something that hit close to home was your statements about the things and PEOPLE closest to you. Many people are held back for so long because they’re too close to what is holding them back. It’s out of focus.

    Secondly, once things and people that hold us back are removed, being around the right people slingshot us into our purpose and destiny. Loved your thoughts!

    -CK

  6. Nice post as always. It’s been a long time since I last read things other than what I am focusing at the moment. Just stopped by to read your posts. Here is where I get good advice or at least hear them again. I am myself in the process of learning what hinders me from getting to my desired objectives as I am going to become a father soon πŸ™‚ Quite excited!

  7. It’s been a long time since I stopped by last (new, bigger and better things at work!). I am so glad I did (as usual). Very nicely said. Thanks.

  8. This is good advice. You really do have to learn to perceive people who are helping you on your journey and people who are trying to hold you back, and at times it is difficult to let things go, but sometimes it is the only way to grow as a person.

  9. Reblogged this on Complicit Grace and commented:
    This post couldn’t be more spot on given the place I am at this moment….I began this last year eliminating the “Stuff” that was unneccesary and am now able to fit my life in the confines of a 9x11ft bedroom…I say this with pride given my current pursuit of becoming a professional organizer…now I have turned my attention to the “People” which of course is much more difficult but must be done. Excellent post.

    1. Thanks for reblogging. Much appreciated.
      I’m glad to see other people working on eliminating the unnecessary. Good luck with the people. It’s a tough one.

  10. Lidiya, you are on point with this post. You have great insight. Sometimes we tend to blame external factors for our lack of progress when in fact, we need to take accountability and consciously eliminate the blockers that are preventing us from moving forward.

  11. Another wonderful post! I can relate to a lot of it, specially that about negative people. However, it is not always easy to eliminate negative people, specially if it is someone close to you. I can’t hurt anyone, so sometimes it is easier to let them hurt me, it actually hurts less, if that makes sense at all. I think sometimes it is easier to just rise above whatever they are saying and not let it hurt, but that is soooooo difficult, specially for super-sensitive people like me! πŸ™‚

    1. I know what you mean. But I changed that in myself. I realized that eventually it hurst both of you if you don’t really enjoy that person’s company as the relationship is not real.
      The first thing we need to do when we have someone like that in our life is to try to change him. Then, if it doesn’t happen, or if he himself is not willing to change, it’s better to go separate ways. It’s just not worth it. And when one door closes, a better one will open for both of you.

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